exercise for today….

Fresh Fish

I got a new home?

I currently hired by Teletech as a Costumer Service Rep.
Under the account of HHO,I really didn’t know what you mean by that.
But it still under the HP printer account, I believe we are going to sell loptops and all HP products.
I haven’t resign from 1&1 yet but I already told my supervisor about it.
I am not sure if I can make it here in Teletech.
I still on Accent and Communication English Training.
I attend the Teletech University during 12 am to 8am, just imagine the time schedule.
The exercises are too challenging, I hope I can pass the exams.
whew!
I don’t know if Teletech will be my second home after 1&1.
But I am here for 1 purpose, I need to earn a living.
This is for my beloved Rai Matieusz.

“Some seek knowledge for the sake of knowledge – and that is curiosity. Some seek knowledge that they may be known to have knowledge – and that is vanity. Some seek knowledge that they may give to others their knowledge – and that is charity.”

10 Love Relationship Don’ts

Are you currently doing things that may be negatively affecting your love relationship? We don’t always understand the impact of the things we do or say until it’s too late. It’s important to avoid the things that inadvertently hurt or push our partner away.

Here are 10 things you should never do in a love relationship…ever!

1. Don’t stop falling in love over and over again

Successful couples continually fall in love with each other. They find new reasons to be in love with their partner and don’t let the petty day-to-day things ruin those feelings. Love doesn’t have to die after commitment. In fact, it should grow to ever increasing heights. So, feel free to fall in love all over again….and again…and again.

2. Don’t value being right over being loving

Too many of us want to be right more than we want to be loving. We choose winning an argument over continually winning the heart of our loved one. When you have to be right, you are simultaneously making your partner wrong. Don’t engage in these 1 or the other conversations. Instead, value your partner’s opinion and then offer up yours. They are both opinions, so 1 is not more or less correct than the other. They are simply 2 different perspectives. If you continue to make your partner feel wrong, they will stop offering their opinion to you. That doesn’t lead to any place good.

3. Don’t stop planning together for the future

It could be planning for the kid’s college or the next vacation. It could be planning for retirement or for a friend’s birthday party. The key is to keep planning together for the future. When you do so, you create common goals to pursue as a unit. This strengthens the bonds of partnership, friendship, and mutual admiration. Find something you are both interested in doing, and work on it together. You are either growing closer together or further apart. Planning together helps to keep you growing together.

4. Don’t stop being attractive for your partner

Many couples stop doing the things that led to the relationship in the first place. If you figured that once you were in a committed relationship that you could stop engaging in attractive behaviors, you were mistaken. Each person in the partnership expected the other to continue doing and saying the things they found attractive. So, flirt. Wear clothing that your partner finds you flattering in. Remind your partner how attractive they are to you. Be playful, be thoughtful and be loving. Be irresistible to your partner and allow them to return the favor.

5. Don’t embarrass your partner publicly

Remember this simple rule: Praise publicly and criticize privately. When the need arises to tell your partner something difficult, do so in the most humble, loving, respectful and honest way possible. In public, tell everyone about how fantastic your partner is. Talk about the things you find best in them. Positive attention is a reward of sorts, and what gets rewarded gets repeated. Your partner trusts you with their heart and emotional security. Don’t publicly criticize your partner.

6. Don’t say “Always” or “Never” while arguing

Whenever we say our partner always does something or never does something, we are exaggerating. The discussion then turns to how the partner being accused must defend themselves against this blatant mischaracterization. The conversation then turns to how you always or never do something. Let’s avoid all of this. When you partner does something you don’t appreciate, say so then and there. Be respectful, yet honest. Don’t pull in past issues. Avoid saying the words “always” and “never” at all costs. Focus on the event or the issue at hand only. Work together to decide how it should be handled next time. Then move on.

7. Don’t use intimacy as a weapon

Do you grant intimacy or take it away as a method of persuading your spouse to do what you want? If so, you are cheapening a relationship expression of love by making it a tool of negotiation. Eventually, your partner may not want to express intimacy towards you or receive it from you because of the conditions attached to it. There should be no conditions on expressions of love. Therefore, stop using intimacy as a weapon. This is your partner! Intimacy should come with no strings attached. It is a beautiful and loving expression that should not be used to manipulate your partner.

8. Don’t talk negatively about your partner to others

So, your partner does something you think is disrespectful. You tell your friends about it. Later, you and your partner determine it was a simple misunderstanding. When you come back around your friends with your partner, what is their impression? Are they seeing your partner as a disrespectful person? Do they have a full understanding that there was simply a miscommunication between you? We are quick to tell everyone about the bad, and very slow to tell them about the good. Be careful. You could be ruining your partner’s reputation even as you know them to be a great person. Avoid talking negatively about your partner.

9. Don’t stop nurturing the relationship

Constantly look for ways to assist your partner. Listen with the intent to understand as they talk about things that are important to them. Be present for all of your partner’s major life moments. That includes illness, major victories, crushing defeats, and family events. Go out on dates. Vacation together. Treasure warm conversation over a hot meal. Express love to each other in the way your partner needs to receive it. Be supportive at all times. Remember that the one you love and gave your heart to is worthy of the very best from you.

10. Don’t break your commitments

Your commitment to monogamy is crucial; so don’t go looking outside for what you already have at home. If you say you are going to do something, do that very thing when and how you promised it to be done. Your word has value that diminishes each time you don’t honor your commitments. So, honor yourself and your partner by honoring your commitments. Do what you said you would do each and every time. Your partner will appreciate you more for it.

Love Bites–For Desperate Women and the Clueless Men Who Love Them

Research shows that when marriages fail, it’s not fighting that tears couples apart. It’s loneliness within the marriage. It’s the feeling that the person who once understood you from across the room no longer has a clue about who you are or what makes you tick. And what’s worse, they either haven’t noticed, or they no longer seem to care. Betsy Sansby, a “marriage-friendly” marriage and family therapist from Minnesota, was determined to help couples on the brink stop drifting and find their way back to each other.

“I used to think that if I could just get couples to stop blaming each other and start seeing how their own obnoxious behaviors were hurting their relationships, their relationships would improve.” So she created three homework tools to help her couples do this: The Stop Strategy, The OuchKit, and The Art of Conversation. And their relationships did improve. “All the couples who consistently used the tools got better at stopping arguments, calming themselves down, recognizing what was beneath their anger, and expressing their feelings with less defensiveness and blame.”

But something was still missing. As one woman put it: “We’re nicer to each other, but I still don’t feel close.” Her husband’s response was: “What more do you want? I go to counseling. I do what you ask. It’s never enough! I don’t think you’ll ever appreciate me.”

Suddenly, after hearing this refrain from enough couples, a light bulb went on for Sansby. “The absence of fighting is not the same as the presence of real appreciation.” “What I realized,” said Sansby, “was that women think they’re being specific in their requests when they’re really not. And men think they understand what women want when they really don’t.” So while couples were no longer fighting bitterly, they still weren’t meeting each other’s intimacy needs.

A woman can tell a girlfriend, “All I want is a little compassion!” and her friend instantly understands what she means. But her husband doesn’t. He needs more information. He’s not an idiot. He just doesn’t speak “Woman.”

Love Bites works because it helps women meet their needs for closeness, connection, and appreciation by teaching them how express those needs in language a man can understand. It helps men meet their needs for closeness, connection, and appreciation by teaching them first to identify what those needs are, and then express them in language a woman can understand. The beauty of Sansby’s tools is that the lessons they teach are built into the tools themselves. No manual is necessary. As another therapist puts it: “Love Bites sneaks up on you. It looks and feels like a game, but the lessons it teaches about giving and receiving are profound.”

Sexual Fantasies

Have you ever given much thought to the differences between the sexual fantasies typically conjured up by men and women? Men, it seems, tend to have more sexual fantasies than women and these are more likely to be paired with masturbation. Men, by nature being visual, are likely to create graphic images of women’s sexual bodies and imagine watching them, seducing them or, quite often, being seduced by them. For a male, the story line of a fantasy is uaually quite genital and accompanied with explicit visual images.

Women, in general, fantasize less than their male counterparts. Those women who do fantasize are typically less visual in their sexual fantasies, are usually less focused on genitals, and are more likely to construct a story with the emotional feelings of a romantic encounter. Women also tend to involve more olfactory and auditory memories… memories of smells and sounds. To be sure, however, there are women who masturbate to their fantasies, be they romantic or erotic.

Sexual fantasies can serve many purposes. They can induce sexual desire, maintain sexual arousal, enhance the sexual experience, trigger an orgasm, and preserve a memory.

The desire to be sexual is not something controlled by a switch and easily turned on following the eleven o’clock news. Many people, particularly as they age or as a relationship matures, find that the easy turn ons occur less frequently, particularly late at night. On those occasions when time is limited, fantasies can serve to focus attention on the anticipated erotic event and help induce the desire for sexual intimacy.

More than one person has told me, “I’m not able to get excited on a moment’s notice. I need time to psych myself up.” To induce desire, you can think ahead about what you would like to experience and what you and your partner will give and receive. Imagine the sexual encounter is your very first, but without those initial anxieties, and let it be, in your mind, a new and exciting adventure. Recall the good sexual feelings you have experienced and mentally reminisce about those most memorable past encounters. Conjure up the memory of a partner’s warmth, softness, and gentle touch. See your partner’s face in your mind’s eye and recall that person’s sounds of pleasure and the aroma of their excitement. Include only the graphic images you are comfortable with.

Desire can be induced mutually throughout the day, with, for example, a phone call to say, “I’ve been thinking of your wonderful body.” The mid-day message, “You won’t believe what I want to do to you tonight,” might stir the erotic imagination of both partners, causing each to spend the day thinking of the possibilities in store for that night.

For those without a partner, fantasies during the day can become the prelude for an episode of self-loving that evening. Self-stimulation, the normal, natural way of experiencing solitary pleasure, is a healthy outlet for many who are alone. Fantasy during the day can certainly prepare you for the quiet celebration of your own sexual response.

Most of us have had the experience of beginning a sexual encounter, only to find our minds wandering off to the worries of the day or the pressing issues of tomorrow. Erotic fantasy can maintain arousal by pushing away the intrusive nonsexual thoughts. When distractions hit, we need only focus on a pleasant sexual memory or project an exciting visual image on our mental movie screen. Fantasies can be of our current sexual partner, but often they will revolve around persons from the past, coworkers, movie stars, or attractive strangers. Bringing others into fantasies is normal and is justified if it serves the current relationship by eliminating distractions that would otherwise dampen or destroy the passion. Obviously, if someone feels guilty about including others in his or her fantasy script, they should be left out. Some people like a cast of thousands, while others want to focus exclusively on their current partner.

Many people worry about their fantasies being too “kinky”, but such fantasies are really quite common. Unusual fantasies can help maintain arousal and are harmless if there is no compulsion to actually experience an act that would be emotionally or physically harmful to oneself or to others. Whereas honesty is usually the best policy, discretion must be used in the sharing of some unusual fantasies or fantasies involving other people. It is rare that a couple can share such deep, dark, private thoughts without, at best, a little discomfort. Too often the reaction upon hearing a partner’s most kinky fantasy is one of jealousy or distrust, if not anger and disgust.

One woman playfully imagined that her partner’s penis was enormous, and reported how she would visualize engulfing this gigantic imaginary erection into her body. In her mind she would privately marveled at her vagina’s ability to swallow up this massive tool. She quickly acknowledged, however, that she had no desire to experience anything that large in real life, but she did enjoy embellishing her fantasy with the thoughts of dressing this impressive male member in doll’s clothing and taking it for walks in the park. During her sexual encounters, this fantasy helped rivet her attention on the pleasure she was feeling from the very adequate, reasonably-sized penis of her partner.

One night, this woman decided that it would be fun to share her giant penis fantasy with her partner. To her utter surprise, the man was devastated upon hearing her playful musings! He began worrying that she had been with men who had larger penises than his, fearing that these well-endowed men must have please her more than he could ever hope to do. He erroneously assumed that she could not enjoy his average-sized penis, and began to feel totally inadequate as her lover. Fearing he could not satisfy this woman, he backed off sexually. When he did try, he felt self-conscious and, as a result, often failed to become erect. This, of course, led to more avoidance and self-degradation.

In couples therapy this man worked on understanding that his partner’s fantasy had nothing to do with his genital size or sexual performance, but made their shared intimacy more exciting for her. In our last therapy session he began laughing and, when questioned, shared his own “pet” fantasy. He had for many years fantasized he was making love to a virgin and that her vagina was the town’s tightest. Both agreed that they loved each other, loved the sexuality they shared, and would never again ask about the private fantasies each used to dispel the occasional intruding distractions. The also learned that in reality, tight vaginas and large penises are immaterial when a relationship is based on love and mutual respect.

The consequences of disclosure were more serious for another couple. The man fantasized about having sex with his wife’s younger married sister. While he found the sister attractive, he had no illusions about her commitment to her husband and would never, in reality, make a pass at her. When he shared his fantasy, however, his wife expressed anger and disbelief. She became extremely uncomfortable whenever her sister was around and believed that she had to watch them both closely for any signs of subtle flirtation. Angry that she now felt distrusting, not only of her husband, but of her sister as well, she chose to end her marriage with the man rather than further damage her relationship with her sister. The fantasy proved to be too close, too personal, and too threatening.

Many shared fantasies, however, enhance desire and maintain arousal. One night a man entered a singles bar, propped himself up on a bar stool and slowly rotated, carefully surveying the women around him. Apparently no one caught his eye, so he turned his back on the scene and sipped quietly on his drink. About fifteen minutes later, a woman walked in. As her eyes adjusted to the darkened room, she also scrutinized the crowd. She wandered around a bit, being careful not to make eye contact with any of the men scattered around the room. After a few minutes of aimless wandering, she moved up beside the man who was seemingly intent on nursing his drink. Sliding between him and the person sitting next to him, she leaned toward the bar to catch the bartender’s attention. As she did, the man felt her breast brush lightly across his arm, but he did not look her way.

After being served, the woman stepped back, drink in hand, and stood behind the man. Aware of her presence, the man turned and looked into her eyes. His unoriginal inquiry, “Do you come her very often?” was met with an abrupt, “No!” As he turned toward her, his leg came to rest against her thigh. She made no attempt to avoid the contact, but waited for him to continue his attempt to initiate conversation. Awkwardly he asked, “What do you do for fun?” Both grinned at her response, “I pick up strange men in singles bars.” At this point the drink he had been nursing so patiently was gulped down in record time and he asked her to dance. She played at being reluctant, but allowed him to convince her. On the dance floor, they danced as though each was covered by porcupine quills and a large man on a Harley-Davidson could have driven between them. As they continued to dance, however, they moved closer until, from a distance, it looked as though their bodies had blended into one.

As they left together he asked, “Shall we take your car or mine?” Again giggling, they took his car to the nearest motel, where he produced a bottle of wine from an ice bucket on the back seat. Ralph and Mary, who had been married for three years, were acting out their shared fantasy. Once in the room, Mary enticed Ralph into seducing her slowly, pretending uncertainty. “I really don’t know if I should!” she said coyly as he pretended clumsiness, fumbling to unbutton her blouse and acting bewildered by the complexities of the one-handed unsnapping of a push-up bra.

During their lovemaking, Mary intentionally cried out, “Oh Bill, you make me feel so good,” and in the morning, Ralph pretended to have completely forgotten her name. It was a night not soon forgotten, providing the erotic content for many fantasies that followed.

Novelty can get lost in long-term relationships. When a couple becomes comfortable and familiar with each other sexually, they often forget to be romantic. The entire sexual scenario might become routine, taking place at the same time of the day, in the same location, and all too often in a hurry to completion. While it might be impractical for most of us to make love on a beach, in fantasy we can imagine the sound of the ocean, the warmth of the sand beneath our body, and the excitement of making love under the stars. Perhaps yours will be a fantasy of making love in the woods, or in an old barn, or in the backseat of a car you had as a teenager.

Some fantasies can be acted out, e.g., a pick up in a grocery store. But most fantasies are just private thoughts that need not have a complex storyline, or a cast of hundreds. Working too hard at building a sexual fantasy can become a distraction, defeating one of its purposes. The best fantasies are often quite simple and tied in with pleasant memories. Often it is visual, creating a mental image of a part of the partner’s body that is pleasing to look at, but impossible to see in the dark or in a particular position. At times words can be added to the fantasy while forming the mental image “I love your buns.”

Special fantasies can be saved for those times when an orgasm is a bit elusive. These favorites can often add the final bit of excitement needed to trigger a powerful climax. Search your inventory of fantasies. Is there one that is particularly powerful? A favorite that is best saved for the climax? If you discover that you have a trigger fantasy, use it sparingly so as not to wear it out. When you are close to orgasm and hovering on the brink, call up that trigger.

It is nice in the afterglow of a loving and lustful encounter to snuggle together and reminisce. Images of the encounter can then be stored for later retrieval to induce desire, maintain arousal, or even trigger an orgasm. Fantasies serve many functions from getting started to getting finished. Remember, sexual fantasies before, during and after a sexual encounter are normal, natural and often helpful in changing a routine experience into a new and exciting event.

The Art of Touching

A national telephone company advertises a long-distance telephone slogan, “Reach out and touch someone.” Each day, we need to reach out and touch those who are close to us. All of us - young and old, single and in relationship - need touch. Actions, in many cases, communicate more than words. Physical contact is a prerequisite both for a healthy individual, and for a fulfilling, mature, loving relationship with a partner.

Our bodies require touch: it relieves stress; it makes us happier and healthier. In our fast-paced lives, however, we often forget the importance of giving and receiving affection through physical touch. We deprive ourselves of this very basic need. We also deprive our loved ones. I can’t emphasize enough how important touch is in any of your loving relationships. We strive to diet, to quit smoking, to drink in moderation, and to exercise, in order to promote a healthy body. In my opinion, touching is the most vital gift that you can give and receive.

Touching promotes a healthy mind, body, and soul. I know, for myself, my days are extremely busy, and at times very stressful. I look forward to the end of the day, when I put my arms around my partner and touch her: It calms me, it relieves my stress, and it allows us to demonstrate our love for one another. When I go out and I see a good friend, I give them a hug: it makes me feel good — and I’m sure that it makes them feel good, too. If you have young children, and you arrive home, they’re excited to see you; in most cases, they want physical contact from you-they want a hug, a cuddle, and a kiss. It makes them feel loved and cared for, and gives them the security that they need from you. After a long, stressful day, that hug and cuddle, whether it’s from your child, partner, or even a friend, is the best medicine you can give yourself.

You may be single at this time. Being single doesn’t mean that you don’t need touching and physical closeness in your daily life. Especially if you have recently ended a relationship, you may be missing the hugs, kisses, embraces and handholding that you once had. Your life and the world do not stop because you’re not currently in a loving relationship - neither does your need for physical closeness and touching. Remember your priorities: it all starts with you loving yourself and taking responsibility for giving yourself what you need. I’m not talking about masturbation here (though that may be what some people need). The art of touching encompasses non-sexual as well as sexual touch. It’s equally important, whether you are single or in a relationship, to get your daily allowance of touching. Demonstrating physical closeness with family and friends is one way to elevate your mood, allowing you to feel loved and fulfilled, while giving love to others. Try babysitting your niece or nephew, or maybe a friend’s child. Young children love holding hands and being hugged or cuddled. This type of touching not only makes them healthier, but also does wonders for you. Also, going for a massage, a manicure, a pedicure, or even a haircut can provide the touching stimulation that our skin needs.

If you are in a relationship, both sexual and non-sexual touch are important. During the euphoric stage of a relationship, sexual touch predominates. You can’t keep your hands off of each other. I think you all know what I’m talking about. In the beginning, sex is a very important part of your relationship with the other person. When mature love begins, non-sexual touch becomes more important, as touch takes on an additional meaning. While sexual touch can communicate sexual feelings, non-sexual touch can simply communicate your love, care, and affection for one another.

Physical closeness and touching stimulates the continued growth of your loving relationships. As our relationships progress, we sometimes begin to take others for granted; we simply get lazy, especially with our loved ones. When it comes to practicing the art of loving in your daily life, you can’t be lazy or take anybody for granted, including yourself. Touching is an integral part of this art, which requires knowledge, effort, and, above all, practice. If you are in a loving relationship, make a concerted effort to touch your partner. Don’t forget to hug and kiss one another before you leave for work, or when you return home. Take advantage of quiet moments during the day to give affection to one another. Hold hands in a movie, at a restaurant, or while walking down the street. Showering or bathing together promotes touching, and will give you physical closeness with your partner. Whether you are at home or in public, demonstrate physical closeness with one another. I’m not talking about public displays of affection that would make those around you want to yell, “Get a hotel room!” I am sure you and your partner know appropriate ways to be physically close in public, to show your caring and affection for one another.

red days.. oh gurls!

I thank God for having my period..
I get panic if I had delays, I do not want to be pregnant again!
I have no enough money to raise children.
My baby Rai is enough for me..

gOinG hOme

This picture was taken in the elevator of i3 Bldg., AsiaTown IT Park
it was 4am, my lunch actually on that day..
I decided to take a picture on the elevator because I was alone..
I am such a camwhore .. noh?!

I was going home at 8am with all the rest of the photo below..

What a beautiful morning…

where am i looking?! hahah
but this picture is cute isn’t it?

talalala.. me the chinita…

love to pout my lips..
my friends tease me pouty because of that hobby..

It looks like I am driving the car..
I know how to drive but I don’t have my own car..
wish to have one.. I want a BMW…

skinny legs..

my friends are at the back..
talk about guys..
babes favorite topic..
love life… ♥

my mother’s graduation gift to me way back in high school..
I just love my name…

me and my heart got issues…♥

Maybe you are asking why there are tiny monster figures on the picture..
They serve to be the evil that tempts me to do things that are
improper to be done as a mom.

Bimbim? I love you….. ♥

bimbim is now officially off!

I am fucking done of you! Mr. Raymer Jugalbot!

your the most useless mammal in the world..

I hate myself for having you into my life!

you crash my dreams and my future!

Your such a moron! You son of a bitch!